while pregnant with our twins i planned to "try" to breastfeed them. and try i did. who knew that it would lead me here... my main concern while pregnant was how they were gonna come out. I really really really wanted to have them vaginally, and i did! (epi did not work so i actually had them med free!!)
then i tried to breastfeed and from the second i latched emerson on it was painful. then I latched avery on and she held her breath every time she was nursing. we worked that out by doing some suctioning. before i left the hospital my nipples were sore. we got home and i continued, and my nipples continued to hurt. i talked to every lactation person i could get a hold of. we tried everything. i was told i had thrush, then i had an infection, then bacterial infection, staph infection, then we treated for thrush again and so on and so on. all along though i was a little bit addicted to breastfeeding. there was something about it that made me slightly crazy...but in a good way. it made me want to continue despite the fact that my nipples looked like someone grated them with a cheese grater. I went through 8 wks of this till i finally went to a dermatologist and she told me i had eczema and all was right with the world. my nipples healed by using a bit of cortisone cream, and i could really really enjoy breastfeeding my twins.
when the girls were 9 months old I went to clc training. certified lactation counselor. then i started helping other moms breastfeed their children without pain. my girls weaned when they were 3 and a half years old. i loved 96% of our breastfeeding relationship and would not trade it for anything.
when i learned how to use a camera i knew something huge was happening, something life changing. then i had someone ask me to shoot their birth. i leaped at the opportunity.
at that shoot i found my "happy". i found the thing that i was meant to do. when baby came out i had this overwhelming urge to get home to my girls. i wanted to do nothing but cuddle my partner and my daughters. i rode that high for about 48 hours. that high was created by oxytocin. oxitocin is a bonding hormone that is released during orgasm, birth and breastfeeding. so i apparently have a very strong reaction to oxytocin. it makes me happy, loving and calm... three things that i have always had a hard time embracing, especially that whole calm thing. im like a squirrel on speed at times.
I had the pleasure of getting an oxytocin fix last thursday 7/19/12 Milo was born at labor of love in lutz. he was born in the water and was a big boy! so cuddly
just a nibble of my last oxytocin fix:
little, or actually big milo (he was 9lbs, 3oz and 21") came out nuchal hand so it was quite painful for his amazing mama. he also grabbed the midwives finger as when she was trying to get his hand back in...
milo's big brother owen was very excited to meet him.
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Learn more about birth photography here.http://sweetplumphotography.com/birth